Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Rick Ross Proposes to Oprah Winfrey


Rotund Ross dropped his album today. I wonder if Oprah's heard the line on "Push It" (see video below) that shouts her out for being a fat kid who grew up to become herself. I'd love to say that, before handing out awards for realizing one's existential potential, Ross should learn how to rap well, but he's got a moderately formidable team behind him that sees real talent as the triviality that it is and fills the void with stunning beats.

Mostly stunning, I should say; in the case of "Push It," I'd like to reiterate that "Scarface (Push It To the Limit)" by Giorgio Moroder has yet to be done justice in a hip-hop sample. I'm not sure who produced Ross's "Push It," but the track ain't that great and fat man does not convince. You would think that these rapper types, who feel the need to fill their houses with cheesy reproductions of the awe-inspiringly cheesy stuff that T. Montana adorned his halls with, would treat Moroder's masterpiece as unfukwitable.

Forego "Port of Miami," then, and go buy the soundtrack to "Scarface," because it's way more likely to inspire you to great feats of criminal enterprise than Ross's labored tales of cocaine kingpindom.

And buy those sunglasses, too. Sweet.

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